This week has had two Mondays. I polled a small sampling of the population (two people) and both agreed with me. Monday was Monday, and then Tuesday was Monday, but meaner. Read the rest of this entry »

I had a dream about a woman who wanted to be a chef. "Someday," she said, "I hope I can be a passionate cook like that." In the dream, I was trying to find a way to leave her a note with three simple words on it: Why Not Today?

Why trade today for someday? Why push our dreams back day after day, until years roll by? Sometimes we forget the dreams. We let the daily complexities overwhelm us. We let the obligations reach a level we can barely survive. We let our lives become controlled chaos, and all our time, energy, and resources go toward holding it together one more day. We never give ourselves a moment to ask what would happen if we let go. Would the world really end? Would our world end?

We need to end this chaotic, frenzied world, this empty, lethargic one. You come home from running all day and collapse in front of a box to watch other people have fun doing the things you wish you could do. Underneath the chatter, you are bored. You never stir the deeper water. The foaming and rushing on top make you seem busy, active, productive, but you are not drawing from the greater resources. You are not even allowing yourself to look that deep.

Deep in that undisturbed place are the visions and dreams. You sunk them like a pirate's chest. You left them there to wait. You wait too long, you'll die and they will die with you.

Meanwhile, there are storms and troubles building on the surface. You are navigating your boat down the river and you have to pay attention. If you jump off to dive into deeper places, the boat will hit the bank. You'll lose direction. You'll lose everything. The wind will fling your vessel and all it holds up and down the river. You will surface and find yourself alone, struggling to swim with no place to rest.

But if you wait until everything is calm, find a good place to tie up your boat, secure your stuff, clean up the storm damage, make sure everyone is okay... the next wind will be rising. Too late to dive in now; you've got to handle this first. Maybe then...

That perfect calm never comes. We have to find a way to live, to keep cruising down the river, maintaining a steady course, and get to that treasure. Nobody wants a shipwreck. But what is the good of an empty ship? Or one with a hold full of junk, haphazard leftovers you skimmed off the surface as you floated by? You may get to port safely, but what will you have once you arrive? The treasure is not for later; it is for now. If it is truly treasure, it will survive the using, the journey, and so will we.

We have to clear out the junk so there is room for the treasure. We must invent ways to handle the storms and keep going in the right direction. We must find a way to get down, get deep, get to what really matters and bring it into our ship. We must make those dives often so that as we use our treasure along the way we can replenish our store.

It seems impossible, but it isn't. There are ways to live deeper than this surface scurrying that we do. As we begin to wake up, we can find them.

The first step toward fulfilment is dissatisfaction.

Resistance is the most toxic force on the planet.

It is the root of more unhappiness than poverty, disease, and erectile dysfunction. To yield to Resistance deforms our spirit. It stunts us and makes us less than we are and were born to be. If you believe in God (and I do) you must declare Resistance evil, for it prevents us from achieving the life God intended when He endowed each of us with our own unique genius. (From the book The War of Art by Steven Pressfield)

The work of art, of creation, is given all of us.

We have a calling. Starting a profitable business, baking cookies, writing poetry, raising children, running a shop, fixing cars, making crafts, designing shoes, doing accounts, designing curriculum, painting, singing, reading, reviewing, helping, overseeing, managing, organizing; whatever the term, some action, some work for life, is yours. It belongs to you and you belong to it. No one is relieved of this responsibility. No one is inartistic, or unable, just dull, unmotivated, lazy, fearful.

Every attempt we make toward something higher and better finds resistance.

We camouflage the call. We are afraid to see it. We make it all so complicated when most of it is so very, very simple. Go check the Self-Help section. Hundreds of titles all say essentially the same thing. This month's version has newer packaging and a cuter catch-phrase. But it's either 1) stuff you know instinctively or 2) drivel to make you feel good about ignoring the stuff you know instinctively.

This article, for instance.

You don't need it.

You know there are things you need to do in life. You know there are particular things for you to do. You feel the tug. You know there is resistance because you are the one resisting. You even know what to do about the resistance, don't you? No? Can't remember? I'll give you a hint:

Ignore the resistance and do what you're supposed to do anyway. Take action.

(Okay, that was more than a hint.) But you knew already! You could probably write this article but for one small quality I (we assume) have and you (we assume) would like to have more of: the voice of successful experience.

Oh yes, you have experience.

You have knowledge. but you're reading this article on the premise that I, the Author-with-a-capital-A, not only have the knowledge but also have the map to the secret goldmine you need: success in applying the knowledge. That little glimmer of gold is what keeps the self-help genre alive. If we share the same knowledge, have similar experience, but I have succeeded and you have not (yet, you say to yourself), then I must have the secret. The key. The difference. It's in this article, somewhere. If you read it all, it will be bestowed upon you, like a prize for wading through all the paragraphs: the final key to insert into the slot which will unlock the door which will release the treasure of your own creative genius successfully!

It's just a flash in the pan.

Ever hear of fool's gold? It's just a sparkly mineral, but there were lots of gold rush miners who got pretty excited. For a while.

The only thing I know that you don't know is that there is no secret to success.

Understand, I'm not saying there is nothing secret about the deep, divine, meaningful, beautiful, worthwhile things of life. There is, and all of us struggle continually to get closer, get more, get immersed, or else to utterly deny its existence. We identify with different parts of the struggle. Marriage, parenting, organizing, self-esteem, setting limits, creative flow. Whatever. The common, and misleading, theme is this: You are a Victim and I, the Helpful Author/Owner/Guru will set you free. I have the key that you, poor child, were never given. I have the question you didn't know you could ask. I'm not better or smarter or worthier... just luckier.

Here's a simple idea we need to deconstruct:

If I'm not successful (moreso than you) because I am better/smarter/worthier than you, why should you listen to me? Don't you want a teacher who is wiser than you? Yes. You do. Heretofore you have gone right along with (sincere or not) self-deprecating authors and have attributed success to that lucky something, that missing piece they somehow found that you somehow missed. They were good enough to share it with you. That's only right, really.

Let's rethink all that.

I'm not saying I am smarter or better or worthier than you. I'm probably not. What I am saying is this: there is no secret that lucky people know and unlucky people don't. Success depends upon your choices and your actions, your habits and your diligence, your persistence and your willingness to work hard, every day, until you see movement. Then you work harder. You are not the victim of cosmic oversight.

Success isn't a given to the lucky few; there are no automatic winners and automatic victims.

But we are enamored of victimization. It is appealing. It removes the responsibility from our shoulders. We can sigh and say, Oh well, it isn't my fault. But if it isn't your fault, my friend, then you really are powerless to fix it. Sure, there is resistance to action, to change, to forward movement, to positive choices. Resistance comes from everywhere: your family, your friends, the culture, the workplace, your peers, your church, your social life. The only Resistance that matters, though, the only one that can actually stop you, is what you allow to come from yourself.

We all have a calling, a work.

Destiny. Fate. Choice. Success. It's what you burn with, what you hate hearing about when it isn't about you, what you can't stop thinking about, what you love, what you drift to while you're waiting for the plane to take off or the game to start or your friend to call. Some of us have covered it deeply and can't even call its name right now. We may have forgotten, but it is a temporary forgetting, one we walked into voluntarily. Somehow we forgot how to stop forgetting. We fixate on little things, details, methods, tradition, criticism, circumstance and let the most important things drift away.

The call isn't lost.

The work, the sanctity, the dream, the draw: it is just buried. It is not my job to tell you what it is. You know it's there. Keep walking toward something better, even if in little steps. Resist the Resistance. You will begin to uncover treasure.

Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great. Mark Twain

Update (Monday): 5 minutes stretching; 40 minutes cardio (walk through town with one kid in the stroller & one in the carrier).

On Writing:
It takes a certain amount of audacity to be a writer. You have to overcome the tendency toward self-degradation. Who I am that I have anything worthwhile to say? Why should people pay attention to me? Well, maybe they shouldn't, but nobody else is writing what I'm thinking. Maybe they're thinking it, too. Maybe I'm not original or wise or witty. But I'm the only one willing to put it on paper and judge what it's worth. Once that's done, once it is written, we can all disregard it as we please. But I can't disregard it until it is written.

On Saying No: (from Alexandra Stoddard's book Making Choices).

Nothing materializes without a program. ...The essence of no is to have priorities and keep them in order.

No has a negative ring to many, but if we don't look at it clearly and use it, we will lose the opportunity to discipline ourselves, to manage our own affairs.

No saves you from the dangerous myth that you're indispensable.

No is not negative; it actively leads to the positive. My own struggle to accept certain restrictions on my time, energy, and money have helped me reach my goals.

Tip: Write something today. Say no to something you normally say yes to today.

"If your career is raising a family, you know how essential it is to be a conscientious person because you influence the atmosphere and character of everything around you. It is enormously satisfying to be good at what you do and enjoy the process. If you make the decision to stay home to raise your children, let your children know through your actions how much fun you're having. Do exciting projects with them, have a good time each day, teach them through example how exciting life can be. Whatever you decide to do, tackle it with the understanding that your personal vision is unique and you can make a contribution no one else can make. Be true to what you believe is right for you. Alexandra Stoddard, Daring to Be Yourself.

Update (Wednesday): 30 minutes cardio, tilling the garden.

Joe brought home a tiller from work. I love this machine. I would polish it and keep it in my bedroom, but he had to take it back to work. I feel like I've lost a limb.

So my cardio on Wednesday was using the YARD BOSS to till up my garden. It took about 40 minutes or so to make it through the weed-infested 10x30 area. By the time I finished, my shoes were muddy, mosquitoes were in my hair, my hands were trembling from the continual vibration of the tiller. I loved it. I would have kept going but it was too dark to see the ground.

Love what you do and every moment is joy. (Note: I did not say "Do what you love." That is a rather different and less productive goal.)

Resources: Go here, read a bit, look at pictures, soak in the inspiration. Then go to your local co-op, feed store, farmer's hangout, or if you must, Wal-Mart. Get some seeds. Really, that's all. Do you have dirt at home? Water? A little patch of earth, or a bucket, or a crate? You're set. Come home with your seeds and make a garden, a tiny one or a big one, in the ground or on your windowsill. Just get some dirt under your fingernails.

Tip: Do clean your fingernails before dinner...

Work is an opportunity to bring something forth - to create something, complete something, invent something original and authentic. Alexandra Stoddard, Daring to Be Yourself.

Update (Tuesday): 40 minutes cardio (walk through town); 8 minutes stretching.

We fight against work. Our American culture celebrates days off, relaxation, vacation, rest, television, games, sports, contests of any kind, races, entertainment: not work, not any more.

Work is a punishment to us, a drudgery we must get through to get to the "good stuff" of life. Books like The 4-Hour Workweek and the popularity of passive income rise from this mindset. Of course, it's great if you can work more reasonable hours and spend more time with your family. And I am all for the idea of generating income through any ethical means you can. (You might notice the ads on this website...) If you are producing anyway, why not attempt to make money? It's good sense.

But the obsession that I notice, the one that worries me, is not that people want to simplify a bit or be smarter about how they earn money for bills; simplifying and smart earning are potential steps to improving your life. What is not a step toward life improvement is the "I-hate-work" attitude.

What's to hate about work? We've all had jobs, at one time or another, that didn't suit us, perhaps, that were far more drudge than delight. Maybe we hated those jobs. In high school, I hated babysitting. I liked the kids, because I was very picky about who I chose to babysit for. But I hated the times - nights and weekends - when I had to be away from my family, cozy at home or doing fun things without me. Even though I hated babysitting, though, I got the work concept and I liked it: I give you my time, service, or product, and you pay me. An equitable exchange. I put up with the timing I didn't like because work was worth it.

In college, I waitressed (among other things). I hated those hours too, nights and weekends again, but I loved the work when it was busy and I was running, jumping, talking, smiling, being efficient, making people happy, working. I hated being there on slow lunches during the week, or on dead holiday nights when everybody in my college town was out of town. Four or five tables, four or five hours of looking for something to fix, or clean, or make, or do, and twenty bucks in my pocket when I walked out? The immediate problem seemed to be not enough pay; the real problem was not enough work. Lack of work created lack of pay.

And that's the problem with many passive income ideas, and with almost all get-rich-quick schemes. The nature of work is that you produce something of value to generate a fair income. An equitable exchange. Value for value. Passive income can work if you create value that will last and can be used over and over again, as in getting royalties from a book or rent from an apartment complex. But expecting to generate income from no value almost always leads you toward unethical "work": spamming, cheating, plagiarizing, defrauding, etc.

"It is not that men are ill fed, but that they have no pleasure in the work by which they make their bread, and therefore look to wealth as the only means of pleasure." John Ruskin, Stones of Venice.

We buy into ideas that don't make sense and can't, ethically, make us money, because we have not learned to value work for its own sake. We think of work as nothing more than a frustrating job we wish we could afford to lose. Money seems like the answer.

The real answer is finding the work you love by learning to love work.

Resources: The best place to start is in the Bible, book of Genesis, first two chapters. Here we see man and woman, in a perfect world, freshly created. Here we watch God give them their instructions: work. Work is not a result of sin, didn't come as a punishment after man's fall (though it did change, and that's part of our problem); work was something for which we were created.

Tip: Determine your own attitude toward work, whether it's a weekend job, a full-time career, or an endless stream of laundry, cooking, cleaning, organizing, and teaching. Do you strive to get through stuff so you can get to the good stuff? Are you cheating yourself out of the delight and fulfillment that come from doing your work with zeal and a standard of excellence?

The wise woman builds her house, but with her own hands the foolish one tears hers down. Proverbs 14:1