I walk an average of 20 miles per week with my babies.
They are 2 years old and 10 months old. My goal is 4 – 5 miles per walk, 5 days per week. On my lowest week, I make it at least 4 days a week and walk 4 miles for 2 of those days and 5 miles for the other two: 18 miles. On my average weeks, I make it 5 days, switching between 4 and 5 miles: 22 – 23 miles. On my “perfect” week (I haven’t yet achieved this), I would walk 5 days, 5 miles each time: 25 miles.
I don’t share this to brag. Walking around a loop a few times really isn’t that big of a deal, but I know how hard it can be to make it part of your life, especially when you must include the schedules and naps and food demands of a young child or two. I make it work for me and my two because it’s important for me. We Moms tend to do everything it takes to build a good world for our babies, and rightly so. Sometimes we forget, though, that nothing matters if Mommy is too sick, too tired, or too depressed to be involved. Exercise is an essential part of keeping yourself healthy. I know this. You know this. It’s taken me until now, though, to really commit the time and effort to live this.
The Whole Exercising Story
I’ve always been pretty thin, and I can’t take any credit for that. Genes. Thank you, Mom and Dad. I ate what I wanted, exercised sporadically, and I was a size 2 when I got married. I moved “up” to a size 4 after the first year of marriage, and then I got pregnant.
Enter Pregnancy, Twice
I stayed pretty fit through my first pregnancy, but I still had about 15 pounds of extra weight hanging on when I got pregnant again. I gained an additional 35 or 40 pounds during that pregnancy. I still wasn’t huge, but I was uncomfortable. I was totally wrapped up in being Mom of two, though, and regular exercise just wasn’t happening for the first few months. When Robbie got to six months old, was sleeping through the night and on a regular nap schedule, I started doing some work-out dvds at home. I was kind of sporadic, though. I lost down to that same old 15 pounds plus a few more, and that’s where I just stayed.
Enter Pregnancy Again
Then I got pregnant again. I know what you’re thinking… Yes, I do know what causes this, and I like it!; Back to the exercise topic now: with this third pregnancy, I have decided that it won’t do to repeat the pattern. I keep adding on another 5 pounds or so; at this rate, I’ll be stuck at 30 pounds over a comfortable weight. A comfortable weight, by the way, is not a size 2, again, mind you; that size 2 was before I got Mommy boobs. We’re talking more like a size 6 (maybe) or 8. That’s good with me. I’d rather wear bigger pants and actually have boobs.
What I’m not okay with, however, is having a 5-months-pregnant belly when I’m notpregnant, having granny flab on my arms long before I’m a granny, or refusing to even own a pair of shorts because my thighs are way too friendly with each other for that sort of exposure. (The ghostly pale hue of my skin will have to be dealt with somehow, I guess, once I get to shorts. But that’s another article.)
Walking It Off, Baby
So I started walking. A week later I saw my mother-in-law and she said, “Annie, you’re the only person I know who loses weight when she gets pregnant.” I love my mother-in-law and her keen powers of observation, have I mentioned that?
Before I started walking, I was having a lot of trouble getting out of bed in the morning. I blamed early pregnancy fatigue, and certainly there was some of that. But there was also a body that wasn’t using enough energy:
“People who exercise regularly are more tranquil and suffer less from stress and anxiety. They are able to concentrate better and sleep more deeply at night. Researchers have demonstrated that the amount of deep sleep you get is proportional to the daytime energy expenditure. The more you exercise, the deeper you sleep. This may be why people who exercise actually have more energy during the day. I see this everyday in my practice. Patients who don’t get any exercise will almost always complain of a poor energy level. Regular exercise will almost always increase their energy level. The more energy that you use, the more energy you will have.” See the source.
I didn’t mean to turn this into an article about why you should exercise, so I’ll stop extolling the benefits and get to the day by day of how it’s done. Or at least, how it’s done in my house. Tweak to match your personality and preferences and little people, just don’t tweak so much that you tweak out the exercising part.
When, Where, and How
Find a time of day when your children are awake and happy and so are you. Okay, you should at least be awake. We’ll make happy optional at this point. I’ve found that as soon as you hit close to nap time, babies don’t like strollers anymore. If your kids are different, then walk during nap time and let them nap if you want. I still think it’s not the best, because you probably won’t get a full nap out of them and it will throw off the rest of your day. But that’s me. You be you.
I go in the morning, because if I wait until afternoon, too much other stuff is trying to crowd in my day and I let it crowd out the exercise. My two wake up at 8 and we all eat breakfast. (I am awake, dressed in my exercise clothes, and drinking my coffee before 8). I finish before they do (better fine motor skills, I guess), so I do my usual morning routine/scramble around the house, then wipe them and the mess, and let them run and/or crawl around while I finish my chores. I finish up by 9, load them in the stroller, grab my phone and water bottle, and we head out.
Find a location that is convenient. I know I would not exercise regularly if I had to load (and unload) kids in car seats in order to do it. I happen to live across the street from the city park, which has a wide, paved, 1/2 mile walking loop (along with multiple pavilions and small playgrounds, a pool, and tennis courts. I know. I’m lucky). If I get bored of the park, I just cruise around town or walk to the other park, which is about half a mile away. It has a paved walking trail, too, and soccer fields.
However, most of the time I stick to the park across the street. Consistency matters. I know the number of loops I need to walk, and, hamster-like, I keep on walking until I get dizzy. I also know the people who come there, the regulars who show up at the same time every day like me. We’re not all chatty – walking is serious business, people – but it’s nice to recognize faces, get a nod and a smile, and know that at least one of them would call 911 if I tripped on a stick and broke my leg. Or if someone tried to grab me and the double stroller and push us into an unmarked van before anyone noticed. Cheery thoughts, eh?
Gear up.
Be smart about walking. Have the gear you need, and by gear I mean good shoes, a good sports bra, and something comfortable to cover your body. Tank top, t-shirt, shorts, spandex, jogging pants. I, for one, cannot afford to go buy an entire new wardrobe of great fitness wear, but I can go buy a decent sports bra (or two). I have a stack of tank tops. I have two pairs of jogging pants that fit me well. I have a good pair of shoes (and socks… more than one pair of socks!). I’m going to be washing clothes 5 days out of the week anyway, so I just make sure my walking clothes are in there.
The only other gear (for myself) is my 1-liter water bottle and my cell phone. I also recommend getting a little can of Mace or one of those alarms to hook onto the stroller right by your hand. Chances are good that you’ll never need to use either, but you want to have them just in case. That’s why I carry my phone, too. If I see anything weird going on, I call Joe and tell him about it. Usually it’s nothing: a man in a truck whom I’ve never seen in the park before, just sitting in the parking lot. He was there two days in a row, and I called Joe both days and told him. Here’s what the man looks like, here’s what the truck looks like, etc. Nothing happened and he didn’t come to the park anymore; but maybe nothing happened because he saw me talking on the phone and looking at him. Who knows? I am on the “better safe than sorry” side of things; if I ever saw anything really weird or obviously illegal, I would skip Joe and just call 911. Then I would call Joe…
Think about gear for your children as well. The loop I walk has a good deal of shade, but about 1/3 of it requires walking directly into the sun, no matter which direction I’m walking. So Mara has a pink floppy hat, and I keep an old crib sheet in the stroller. When we curve around into the direct sunshine, I throw the sheet over the canopy on Robbie’s half of the stroller so it hangs down in front of his face. He doesn’t like having his view blocked, but he likes direct sun even less. You might need sunscreen or bug spray for your babies. I don’t take sippie cups or snacks for them; they’ve just finished breakfast, they’re not exerting any energy, and they can have a drink and snack when we get home.
Push yourself.
Push yourself further than you think you can. I used to walk regularly, but only 2 miles or so each time. It didn’t make enough of a difference quickly enough to keep me motivated, and I let it slide. That changed when I started walking again, because I walk with my neighbor about half the time. She is an itty bitty woman whose youngest child is almost 9 years old. When my neighbor walks, she does at least 10 laps. That’s 5 miles. The first time she told me that, I said, “Hmmmmmm.” And then “hmmmm” again. And then, “How many laps?”
I was walking by myself 2 or 3 miles at a time, thinking that was my limit. Then I went walking with her and we walked 5 miles. It wasn’t about fatigue or distance; it was about boredom and laziness. I get bored when I walk by myself, and I get lazy when there’s no one to push me further. But now that I walk with her, I know we are going to walk 5 miles. And now when I walk by myself, I know that I <em>can</em> walk 5 miles, so I make myself walk at least 4.
You’re getting a free ride; what more do you want?
Think about entertainment for your kids… but not too much. You’ll notice something with your kids. They will get bored around mile 2, especially in the first couple of weeks. But then they’ll get used to the routine. So they’ll get bored around mile 3, instead. What you shouldn’t do is let your kids haul fifteen toys, a blanket, and a doll with them. You know what happens: one by one, each item is dropped (oops!) out of the stroller, Mom leans down and grabs it, loses momentum, hands it back. Repeat ad infinitum. Mara gets one small blankie or toy. If she drops it, it gets shoved in the back of the stroller until I decide to pause for a drink of water. Robbie gets nothing but a pacifier, and I hold off on that until around lap 6.
What they do get, though, is conversation (with me) and time outside. I point out the trees and grass, the airplane, the truck like Daddy’s, the big rocks. I ask Mara about colors. She counts the big rocks. Sometimes I slow down enough to grab a couple of rocks or a little tree branch with leaves still attached, and she gets to entertain herself with those for a few laps. She shares with Robbie, too, but once she or he drops them, they’re gone.
Be consistent.
For the most part, the kids do fine. They were more restless the first week or two. Now they’re used to the walk, they get excited about loading up in the stroller, and they are happy almost all the time. Consistency makes a big difference here. Kids tend to like what is familiar to them, right? So they might resist Mommy’s new exercise efforts at first because it’s new and different and they’re not sure they like it better than staying inside and playing with their toys. If you persist, however, they’ll get used to it. They’ll forget that there was another option, ever. They will come to expect it like the expect meals and bathtimes. It’s part of the day. Okay. Whatever, Mom.
Use that consistency to power yourself on the days when you’re tired, sore, or blah. Remind yourself that you’re working too hard at this to deal with cranky kids again. You’ll feel better afterward.
Plan ahead.
Have a plan for after the exercise is over. My walk lasts from around 9 to around 10. Robbie is ready for his morning nap when we get home, so he goes straight to bed. Mara doesn’t take a nap in the morning anymore, so she gets a snack. I sit down and eat a piece of fruit with her, then I go take a shower while she finishes her snack. She knows that when she’s through she can get down and play, but she’s usually still sitting there munching away when I get out of the shower. The key here is a snack that is non-messy and in small pieces so has no trouble eating it and I don’t have to worry about a mess.
Reap the benefits.
I feel better about myself when I am exercising regularly. I sleep better. I eat better foods, because I don’t want to waste all my effort just for a double quarter-pounder. I fit in my clothes better, and I look better. My skin looks healthier. I stay awake during the day. I wake up better in the morning. I don’t worry as much. My immune system is better. I enjoy seeing the blue skies and the green trees and the people. I don’t feel closed in; I feel like part of a community.
One final thought: my two love the little baby swings, but I hardly ever stop at the swings during exercise time. It would add another 15 to 20 minutes onto the hour I’ve spent there, and by the time I’m through walking Robbie is ready for his nap. I could cut my walk short: that would be missing the point. I love my children, and I love taking them along, but the exercise is for me. When we go to the park any other time, it’s for them. Balance is important. Guilt is bad. Remember that keeping yourself in good health automatically makes you a better Mom, so a little swing deprivation won’t hurt the kids.
Here’s a little summary:
- Get motivated.
- Find a good time.
- Find a convenient location.
- Gear yourself up: good clothes, water, safety items.
- Be safe.
- Gear the kids up (but not too much).
- Push yourself.
- Exercise with someone else.
- Expect some boredom.
- Be consistent.
- Create an after-exercise routine.
Now get out there and exercise!
Image Credit: Stroller sign from smudie.