SISTER WISDOM

This guest post is written by Betsy Ball Clark. If you’re interested in writing a guest post for Sister Wisdom, see the guidelines here.

My oldest daughter recently handed me a tiny strip of paper on which she had written, “Do you have secrets about me, that you are keeping from me?” I laughed when she gave it to me. “Like what?” I asked, “That I found you in a basket on my front porch on a cold rainy night with a note that said ‘Please take care of this baby’?”
Now she laughed. “No,” she said, “That you dropped me in a ton of toxic waste and I have super powers.”
Some days I wish I had super-powers.

Perhaps at first glance, my home would appear to be somewhat conventional; my husband works. I work at home (I prefer “Domestic goddess”), and home school my children, but the ideals I had in my mind about orderliness in home making have turned out to be anything but “Ideal” in my home.

Nature abhors a vacuum, and I abhor clutter. I have declared war, but so far, nature is winning! Periodically I sink into pits of despair about my lack of organizational discipline. I make attempts, and hopefully each time I am taking small steps to grow in this area. But the real hope I have in making a home is the loving, growth and shaping of four wonderful people I love more than anything else in this world.

Three Things I Want to Achieve

1. Love my husband well.
My children watch how my husband and I interact with one another. They see us fail, and they see us succeed. I want to model true, self-sacrificing love to them. I also want to model that self-sacrificing love requires renewal on occasion. I want them to know that healthy self-sacrifice doesn’t require becoming a non-person. Just as I want them to become the best that they can be in who they are, I want them to see us doing the things we enjoy and living life fully.

2. Help My Children Discover their Passions.
Things they love, and things they really, really like. Children are each so very different and sometimes I expect them to fit neatly into proper little children boxes. I am learning to train and teach them uniquely in the ways that will be most effective for them, as the distinct and beautiful creatures they are. This is a continual learning process for me. My oldest is a fiery, passionate “artist” in the making. My second, as a classic boy loves “the machine” (technology) and relationships are not as openly important to him. My third is all about inter-personal relationship, and has perceptions and interactive skills that blow me away!

3. Help my Children Discover and Pursue their Purpose.
Our passions surround our central purpose as spokes on a wheel. I believe God’s purpose for each of us is to glorify Him. This may look different for each person. Enjoying the good gifts He gives and thanking Him for them is to bring Him glory. Serving others, creating, working, playing, laughing, weeping with the sorrowful, loving, and finding the vocation you want to pursue, all have to do with our passions. Colossians 3:23 says “Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men.”

This has become somewhat of a life verse for me. My understanding of what brings God glory has grown from a narrow “Stained glass” view into a flourishing, rich tapestry that all of life; doing dishes, changing diapers or performing surgery can be a magnificent expression of honor to God if it is done as to Him.

As my small children grow, my place in their lives moves from one of control (while they were babies I did everything for them) to one of influence. Their external behavior can be somewhat controlled by environment when they are young, but if there is no change and redemption of their hearts, when the circumstances change, they will change with them. As they grow into adults, I long for them to be securely anchored to an unchanging Rock of Jesus Christ that will safely guide them through all the storms of life.

It is a wonderful thing to know that you will always be loved and treasured by Him as you enjoy the rich gifts He has given while you make a temporary home here on earth. I would love to share how you can be in relationship with Him if you don’t know Him yet!

Really, if you live in a home, you are somewhat of a home maker. Homes are the hubs from which we live life. We rush in and out, to soccer games, or church, or the grocer. We fuss over how we want it to look and feel. We invite friends to share time and food together with us. All these things are important. They are the things we do, but overall, the home is only an expression of who we are. It can be warm and cozy, and a little messy. It can be perfect and sterile, like a picture in a magazine (sometimes I wish I lived in a magazine, or at least had a maid who made it look like I do).

I shall bear my discontent about my housekeeping imperfections. I shall strive to overcome them, and be grateful when my husband is patient with them. But most of all, I shall enjoy the gifts one day at a time of the ones I love, here in my imperfect home.

Today’s 2 Cents Courtesy of:

Betsy Ball Clark is a second generation homeschooler living in Greensboro, NC with her husband Greg, and their three children, whom she homeschools: Jessica – 9, Joshua – 7, and Grace – 3. She enjoys being with family and friends, hiking, coffee, and fun. Betsy and her family attend Seacoast Church, and try to live by Ecclesiastes 8:15. She writes at her personal blog and at Beauty – Women Only, which is primarily for the purpose of encouraging women.