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Regaining Control with a Morning Routine 3

Part 2 of the series: The Get-Your-Life-Together Plan

morning

Benefits of a Morning Routine

What you do with your morning effects your entire day. Energy begets energy. Order begets order. I don’t always enjoy getting out of bed, but I enjoy what the rest of my day is like when I get out of bed on time and make myself go through my routine.
One morning not long ago, after a week of great consistency on my early rising and morning routine, I decided to try just going with the flow... ignoring routine, just doing what I felt like doing, taking it easy, rolling from one thing to the next ‘as the spirit moved me.’
I decided that wasn’t the right spirit for me. It’s fine sometimes, for holidays and weekends, but the normal day of work requires order, energy, and a good dose of knowing who’s in charge. When I just wander around, it’s clear that I’m not continue reading…

Day 29: The Get Up Early Challenge and Wrap-Up 1

Challenge Update: The final day, and I slept in with snooze until about 5:45. So I’m not exactly ending on a glorious note. Overall, though, it’s been a good challenge. Reporting daily definitely gives me a sense of accountability that motivates me past some of the slumps I usually just fall flat on.

I will need to continue working on this habit, however, to make it solid. I allowed enough interruptions and “snoozes” to keep it from becoming an unquestioned part of my daily routine. I am convinced that it is worth it. I really enjoyed the time I had in the morning and felt better prepared to deal with the day. I started out feeling ahead of things rather than running behind.

The sleepiness was a problem, probably the most difficult part of the challenge for me to overcome. I could make myself get out of bed physically but staying awake and alert enough to think, read, or write sometimes seemed impossible. I think the best fix for that is getting enough sleep on a regular basis; for me, that doesn’t mean eight hours every night but it does mean being aware of when I am tired and going to bed accordingly.

Build It: 5am may be too early for you (or too late!) but the essence of the idea isn’t the exact time but that you have a specific time and stick to it, day in and day out, until it is a habit. Once the habit is established, you have a little elbow room for sick days and off days; frankly, though, I would rather get up at my 5am alarm, have that peaceful, calm time, and then get a nap later in the day if I am that tired. Not everybody can work naps in, I understand.

So set a time that works for you and stick to it, consistently, for at least 21 days. Plan your morning time so you aren’t left staring blankly at the coffee maker, wondering why you aren’t in bed anymore. If that happens, the pull of the pillow will work on you and you will end up buried under covers, zombie-fied, rolling out of bed at the last minute, running around, back to the old frustrations.

Try it. It’s worth it.

Day 28: The Get Up Early Challenge Comments Off

Challenge Update: I was a little behind (that darn snooze button) but I got up at 5:45 and am feeling good. Feeling great, actually. Even though I went to bed late last night (around midnight), I am awake and thinking this morning. I do need to watch my bedtime though; I can do three or four “short” nights (5 to 6 hours) but then I need a “catch-up” night of eight hours or more.

Or I need to start taking naps in the afternoon. I napped a lot while I was pregnant but I’ve since gotten out of the habit. Now I find it difficult to slow down and rest in the middle of the day, even when I’m tired. I’m working on not being in such a non-stop mode but it is still habit.

Build Your Better Life: Set up a date night with your husband. Now. Get your calendar, give him a call, find a babysitter, do whatever you need to do to make this happen within a week. I let it slide too long, sometimes, and though we see each other we don’t get that focused time to reconnect.

Connecting with your spouse is worth whatever sacrifice it takes to make it happen. Remember, you don’t have to spend a lot of money. You can eat sandwiches at home and go get a cup of coffee together. Or just go walk around the mall. Just make sure that you have time and space to talk to each other about more than the kids and the car and the stuff at work. Get a little deeper. Ask questions. Pretend it’s your first date.

For the singles sisters, here’s a suggestion: set a date for yourself or with a close girlfriend and make a list of the five essential qualities for your future husband. Don’t be trivial (great abs) and don’t be vague (good character). You need to know the things that are make-it-or-break-it in a relationship, and if you share them with a friend who can hold you accountable, all the better. If you’re feeling really ambitious, make a list of the five essential qualities you need to have to be a great wife. Do you have them all? What can you work on? Get started!

Day 27: The Get Up Early Challenge; Overdoing the To Do List Comments Off

Challenge Update: This morning the alarm went off, I got up, and though I’m a little sleepy, I feel more human than zombie-like. This is a first for the last couple of weeks.

I haven’t been getting enough sleep and this is why: my habit is to go to bed when I get sleepy, say, when I can’t concentrate on the page I’m reading or the movie I’m watching. Lately, I’ve been busy moving around, talking to people, working physically on projects. We are remodeling our basement; every night Joe comes home and works for a couple of hours and I try to help. We’ve also had several C.O.P.S. meetings, formal and spontaneous. When I’m active with work (physical) or with people (conversation), I don’t get those “hey-I’m-sleepy-and-should-go-to-bed” cues.

I’ve been feeling depressed in the evenings, too. I hate being depressed, so when I start feeling it I immediately try to figure out what the cause is. Do I need some time with Joe? Am I worried about something that I haven’t shared with him? Did I get my feelings hurt and not talk about it? Am I upset with someone and stuffing it instead of dealing with it? Am I overwhelmed? Have I committed to too much? This time I haven’t been able to pinpoint it, though, and that bothered me. Lots.

Last night we finished dinner and Joe and I flopped down on our big cushy couch-chair to talk and play with Mara for a few minutes before starting on the basement. As I’m leaning back, watching Joe and Mara (in a rousing game of “Get the Pen Out of Daddy’s Pocket, Drop It Behind Your Head, and Pretend You Don’t Know Where It Is,” one of our favorites), I feel my eyes get heavy… and heavier… and I realize something…

  1. I am very tired. Sleepy. Ready for bed. Past ready for bed. Desperate for sleep.
  2. Depression (for me, low energy + self-pity + “hopeless” feeling + no motivation) is because I am physically weary.
  3. It is barely 8pm.
  4. For the first time, it occurred to me that maybe I’m trying to do too much. I got up at 5, read my Bible, wrote 2 articles, exercised, cooked, cleaned, did laundry, took care of babies, ran errands, ordered a birthday gift, picked out songs for church, did website work, read books to Mara, nursed Robbie (4 times), talked to my sister on the phone (3 times), and finished reading a book I started the day before. And I was disappointed because I didn’t get to planting my seeds for seedlings.

When I’m going nonstop from 5am and only feel bad because I didn’t do more, perhaps my perspective is off. I’m getting so low on energy by evening that it is translating to depression. I’m falling asleep if I sit down for five minutes. My standard response has been not to sit down for five minutes. Ignore the signals, keep pushing on. Last night I decided that was stupid. So I put the kids to bed, cleaned up the kitchen, and put myself to bed. Joe told me to get some sleep, and he worked on the basement (by himself, sweet man).

Eight beautiful hours later, I actually feel good. Awake. Hopeful. Energized. And a little humbled.

I like to believe that I am Superwoman. Some days I can pull it off, and those days make me think I should be able to pull it off all the time. I get so caught up in the energy and accomplishment of doing things that I neglect the basics. Sleep. Relaxation. Talking. Resting.

I put “Decide on Next Monthly Challenge” on my calendar this week. I know what it is now: a month with no to-do list. I need the freedom. I need the discipline of not focusing on accomplishments and check marks and productivity for productivity’s sake. March should be an interesting month.

Improve Your Life: Simplify your schedule. Write down your appointments, activities, and just two or three to-do items. Give yourself some breathing room. You might actually be more productive.

Be Open-Minded:
You must learn to say no when something is not right for you. Leontyne Price

…the eyes of man are never satisfied. Proverbs 27:20
God does not judge us by the multitude of works we perform, but how well we do the work that is ours to do. The happiness of too many days is often destroyed by trying to accomplish too much in one day. We would do well to follow a common rule for our daily lives–DO LESS, AND DO IT BETTER. Dale Turner
He who trusts in his own heart is a fool, but he who walks wisely will be delivered. Proverbs 28:26

Day 26: The Get Up Early Challenge Comments Off

Challenge Update: I’m on a roll, feeling like this 5 am wake time is more habit than not habit. I think I am going to have to continue to think of it as a monthly challenge for another month, however, to really get the habit solidified. Those few days of sickness and “rest” threw off my rhythm. Getting up is rather habitual, but my body is trained well enough to stay awake yet. I can stay awake, and do, but it’s a struggle. I need to get that pattern in place so my body clock adjusts. I also need to work on going to bed a wee bit earlier than, oh, midnight.

Improve Your Life: Bill Ford, in his book High Energy Habits, suggests making a list of all the little things that annoy you and then dedicating time to taking care of those things. Here’s what he says:

We pick up a lot of drag in our lives; little things that slow us down, which we hardly notice and come to think of as just part of life – inevitable friction, like barnacles on a ship’s hull. The good news is that we don’t have to put up with them and life is different when we do something about them.

Ford suggests making this list and then choosing three of the easy items on the list and tackling them immediately. He suggests making time every day to deal with these annoyances. And yes, for the inevitable protest of no time, he has an answer:

We are so busy that these little things do not seem to justify a high priority. But it takes energy to ignore them. And that is the cost – the energy spent on ignoring is wasted and it adds up.

So take his advice. I’m working on it. Yesterday I got rid of a dead plant that had been sitting in my living room, annoying me, for months. Then I tried to fix the loose screw on our table. I say tried because once I got the screwdriver and got under the table, the only screws I could locate were tight. So this is an annoyance I will have to pass on to my husband, the resident fixer-improver-constructor-man.

Be Open-Minded: Take a moment and think of a person you spend a lot of time with, like your spouse, your children, your cubicle mate, your best friend. Identify one thing you do, habitually, almost unconsciously, that has the potential to annoy that person. (Just pick one!) Work on eliminating that habit, or replacing it with something that will uplift and energize rather than annoy. You’ll find yourself more uplifted and energized as well.

By the way, you can buy Ford’s book online at Amazon for as little as $1.99. It’s a good framework for revamping some life habits that drain you and includes chapters and suggestions on using your strengths more often, clearing clutter, creating time to think, and more.

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