SISTER WISDOM : build a better life

“Any change, even a change for the better, is always accompanied by drawbacks and discomforts.” Arnold Bennett

Update (Thursday): 25 minutes cardio (walking in town); 12 minutes stretching.

I found a piece of paper from some old files of my Mom's. It is called "Everday Stretching" and has a series of 20 stretches. Probably one of her physicians gave it to her to help with the lower back pain. I'm not dealing with any lower back pain, but I hear stretching is a good idea. I'll give it a try.

In any of my exercise endeavors, I've never really given much thought to stretching, warming up, cooling down, or any of those commonly recommended procedures. I figure, hey, I have the energy now to do something that burns lots of calories, why waste it on something that doesn't burn lots of calories? Something like a calf stretch? So I would just take off jogging until I felt like I was about to die, then stop and breathe heavily, then go again as long as I could. (All of you real runners who are reading this are groaning right now, aren't you?)

Change is difficult even when it is good. Change requires a different mindset, a different response than what we're used to. Change is stretching all the tight places of our mind and emotions and even though they need to be stretched, they resist. We resist. I resist.

My husband's day off is usually a "lazy day." We sleep in, eat breakfast around noon, hang out in our pajamas, play with the kids, eventually get dressed and go do something fun together. Occasionally something productive, too.

For the last couple of weeks, Joe has been organized with a list of things to accomplish and intent on getting stuff done. This is great, I think; it's his only day off, besides Sunday, which is for church and rest and family. He has a lot of projects, and a lot of ideas, and as much as I want to help there are many things that only Joe can take care of. So his decision to be organized and productive on his day off is good. I applaud it.

I resist it. It took me a while to figure out why. (The coffee hadn't kicked in yet.) I mentally agree that the change is good and needed; emotionally I am not ready for the way it cuts into our lazy fun time and requires a change in my attitude, my expectations, my response, my plans.

I am slow to adjust. Once I began to see the reason for conflict (my own resistance to changing my expectations), it became easier to let go. When I finally accepted change, we ended up having a productive day as well as a fun time together. Often it isn't what we have to let go of that creates the resistance; it is simply the fact that we have to let go at all.

Resources: Stew Smith from Military.com offers a Stretching Plan with brief descriptions of 11 stretches which Mr. Smith recommends doing before each workout.

The stretches I did (which were simple, low intensity, but felt good) came from Stretching.com, where you can order wall charts, laminated charts, or any of several different books on stretching.

Better Homes and Gardens has an article with more detailed descriptions of Seven Great Stretches.

LifeTips has a great line of tips on stretching: descriptions of particular stretches as well as "in general" stretching advice.

Tip: If you're a previous non-stretcher (like me), start with 5 - 10 minutes of stretching and work your way up to 15 - 20. The more I stretch, the more convinced I am that it's helpful and healthy, plus I am getting better at targeting the muscles and really feeling the release and relaxation from the stretch. So go for a few minutes of really focusing, and as you get better and feel each stretch more, you can add more stretches in without getting bored.

People with integrity have firm footing, but those who follow crooked paths will slip and fall. Proverbs 10:9

“Use now and then a little Exercise a quarter of an Hour before Meals, as to swing a Weight, or swing your Arms about with a small Weight in each Hand; to leap, or the like, for that stirs the Muscles of the Breast.” Benjamin Franklin

Update (Wednesday): 20 minutes cardio (walking in park); 5 minutes stretch/abs.

Using the opportunities you have helps you to do something that otherwise you would find excuses not to do. That is most possibly the wordiest sentence possible and says the least but I am using a really loud keyboard right now and just typing more words than necessary because I like the sound it makes. Clack clack clatter.

Okay. Let's try it again. I think what I want to say is this: You can either find a way to make do with what you have and reach your goal regardless of your circumstances, or you can make excuses and stay where you are, which is not where you want to be.

As Steven Pressfield says in his book The War of Art , "Casting yourself as a victim is the antithesis of doing your work. Don't do it. If you're doing it, stop." (By the by, there are 118 customer reviews at Amazon on this book. Is that normal? 118? Wow.)

Resources: Go to your local library or bookstore and check out a copy of Pressfield's book. It's a great, creative kick-in-the-pants, and though it addresses the "creative life" most directly, the principles apply to any endeavor.

If you are a graphic designer or photographer, check out TheCreativeForum.com, which is "a Web-based community for the creative professional that will allow graphic designers, art directors, commercial photographers and other commercial artists to exchange creative ideas via posting of images and work samples for discussion and critique." There you have it.

If you're a writer, read this excellent article from Write to Done - which I don't know much about, but I'm impressed with what I've seen; I think it's a good find - on establishing the daily habit of writing. (It comes from the Zen Habits blogger, Leo Babauta, so it's got to be good.)

Tip: It's more important to be diligent in the small things, everyday, than to kill yourself trying to accomplish that one big thing. The small things add up to big things. Pick something you've been slacking on (time with your spouse, exercise, calling a friend, reading, cooking a good meal) and be diligent and excellent at that small thing. There will be big results. It's just a matter of time + diligence.

Teach the wise, and they will be wiser. Teach the righteous, and they will learn more. Proverbs 9:9

Character is, for the most part,simply habit become fixed. C. H. Parkhurst

Update: 30 minutes combined cardio + toning: Pilates Workout for Dummies DVD.

I guess I'm one of those people who feels like I know how good my workout was by how sweaty my shirt is. So Pilates and I, especially when you consider my less-than-stellar sense of balance, are not exactly bosom buddies. The DVD introduction was long, by my standards, and I skipped part of it. "Just get to the exercises, lady!" The exercises look simple. They are simple. Just don't equate simple with easy.

The point of Pilates is to build a strong core, as explained on the Balanced Body website.:

Building on the principles of Joseph Pilates, Pilates exercises develop a strong "core," or center of the body. The core consists of the deep abdominal muscles along with the muscles closest to the spine. Control of the core is achieved by integrating the trunk, pelvis and shoulder girdle.

I do not have a strong core. This truth became clear to me about halfway through the "Basic" section of the DVD (which, you remember, is for dummies). I finished up, and my legs were sore for the rest of the day. By night, I could feel all the muscles in my back talking, and they were not saying good things to me.

So, I call that a successful workout, even though my shirt wasn't sweaty, the music was slow, and there was a long introduction. It is a good change from my normal choice of fitness activity: upbeat, quick movements, more emphasis on energy than accuracy. Pilates requires concentration and control and produces a more intense effect than I would have predicted.

Resources: Read more about the history of Pilates, how to get started at home with Pilates, or watch a video that introduces some basic Pilates stretches or another video that focuses on Pilates for abs.

If you still need some healthy eating ideas, check out About.com's list of Top 10 Low Fat Recipes for Spring and get inspired. I'm not a fan of just substituting low or non-fat versions of things to make a recipe "healthier," so I will skip the two dessert options (Key Lime Bars and Creme Brulee). But the Spring Salmon Salad sounds great, and I want to try the Pea and Mint Soup. With full-fat sour cream, though, or none at all, thank you very much.

Tip: To make changes toward healthier eating, start with small changes in what you keep at home. Don't buy another bag of chips or box of Little Debbies, or even some processed, organic concoction. The healthiest eating is simple food in its most unaltered form: a fresh apple, orange, banana, or kiwi for a snack; lightly steamed carrots or broccoli tossed in sea salt and a pat of good butter for a dinner side. Make a few changes on your next grocery trip, and get some fresh, good stuff instead of that boxed, processed "non-food" you've been eating. You can do it!

Do not be wise in your own eyes; Fear the LORD and turn away from evil. It will be healing to your body And refreshment to your bones. Proverbs 3:7-8

Keep steadily before you the fact that all true success depends at last upon yourself.
Theodore T. Hunger

Update: 30 minutes cardio (walking); 10 minutes toning (stretching, lunges).

Another good sunny day. Mara and Robbie and I went to the park and did a couple of laps around the walking track, then I let Mara walk around in the field. She proceeded to taste the gravel off the sidewalk and tramp merrily through a 6" deep puddle. We had a good time and were all worn out by nap time.

Resources: My friend J who is my "losing-weight buddy" told me about this site called Calorie Count.com. It's free to be a member, and you can log in your food daily to get an accurate idea of the calories you are consuming. It has an extensive list of food in its database and you can add more if you have the nutritional information. I haven't been faithful in doing this, but even the few days I've managed to log on and log my food in have really helped me be more aware of the mindless eating I do that adds up to a lot of calories. Try it for a few days if you're wanting to lose weight or just be more aware of what you eat. There are lots of other resources there, too, like an exercise log and fitness recommendations.

The other half of gettin' (or stayin') skinny is what you put into your getting-skinny self. Eating Well Magazine's website has quick and healthy dinner recipes that sound good and are categorized by "30 minutes or less" and "15 minutes or less." That's what we need for a busy weeknight. Delicious Living Magazine has a nice collection of healthful-minded recipes, including a good list of vegetarian dinner options. The flatbread pizza sounds appealing, as does the Mixed Pepper Frittata. Both of those are nice options because pizza toppings or frittata fillings can easily be substituted with what you've got on hand.

Tip: If you're trying to get going on a morning exercise routine, get all your clothes and any needed gear ready the night before. Lay out your shoes, socks, clothes in the bathroom and have anything else you need by the door, so you don't have to stop and think.

"... walk in the way of good [men], and keep the paths of the righteous." Proverbs 2:20