I tend toward what is easy. Discipline, pain, sacrifice? I shudder at the thought. Yesterday the sermon was on being spirit-led. Sounds nice, but it was uncomfortable: controlling your appetite, saying no to what you want, realizing that the urge toward what is easy, comfortable, and instantly gratifying is probably the opposite of what spirit-led means.

Everything worthwhile that I have done has required discipline, pain, and sacrifice. Think about pregnancy and birth. Even getting married, candy-coated as that time was, required change, which is always difficult, and leaving behind the old life to begin a new one. Read the rest of this entry »

Most worthwhile things are difficult at first. I wasn’t born a professional; no one is, whether their chosen field be basketball, business management, or motherhood. Most of the time, I achieve a level of mediocrity in what I do and stay there, satisfied to be average or a little above. Read the rest of this entry »

Alex and Brett Harris wrote a book called “Do Hard Things” which I probably would know nothing about but for an excerpt in TPE, the magazine of my church’s denomination. (Yep, I’m one of those crrrrazy Pentecostals. Are you scared? Are you making assumptions right now? You are, aren’t you? That’s okay. I love you anyway.)

I was impressed. The book is directed toward teenagers, which, strangely enough, is a group that no longer accepts me as one of their own. (I am still a little hurt by this.) The book’s premise seems to be (understand, I have only read an excerpt, not the whole book, so I’m sailing a little blind here) that the “Myth of Adolescence” has turned a group that should be vibrant, energetic, unstoppable into a lethargic and rebellious one.

What a waste. As the book says, “We waste some of the best years of our lives and never reach our full God-given potential. We never attempt things that would stretch, grow and strengthen us. We end up weak and unprepared for the amazing future that could have been.”

I’m 26. My husband is 25. We’ve both been working since we were about 14. Of course, it was part-time during the school year, and some of my earlier jobs were just baby-sitting. But at that tender, adolescent age, our parents expected us to begin to take responsibility, to pay for stuff we wanted, to contribute. We didn’t have to put grocery money into the family pot or anything, but that probably wouldn’t have been a bad idea.

We’re not rich, by any means. But we have worked for and gained an independence that many of my peers seem unable to find. And we’re not talking teenagers! It starts then, back at 13, or before, maybe at 10, or 6, when the whole world revolves around a child’s happiness. At what point do you let the child know that the point of the world isn’t to make him happy? It’s a sad awakening, and I have friends who are still fighting that knowledge as hard as they can.

Some people manage to avoid acknowledging that truth their entire lives, and they are the ones who Alex and Brett describe on their blog as “ Peter Pans who shave.” (This article they wrote describes more about “adultescence.”)

I see that in my generation, now in our mid-twenties. I see that in the one coming behind me, the teens with shiny laptops and enormous libraries of music on their iPods, but with no vision for the future, no library of skills or knowledge or character from which to draw.

We’re going to be playing catch-up for a while. We better start getting over our own lies and pointing the way.

I had a dream about a woman who wanted to be a chef. “Someday,” she said, “I hope I can be a passionate cook like that.” In the dream, I was trying to find a way to leave her a note with three simple words on it: Why Not Today?

Why trade today for someday? Why push our dreams back day after day, until years roll by? Sometimes we forget the dreams. We let the daily complexities overwhelm us. We let the obligations reach a level we can barely survive. We let our lives become controlled chaos, and all our time, energy, and resources go toward holding it together one more day. We never give ourselves a moment to ask what would happen if we let go. Would the world really end? Would our world end?

We need to end this chaotic, frenzied world, this empty, lethargic one. You come home from running all day and collapse in front of a box to watch other people have fun doing the things you wish you could do. Underneath the chatter, you are bored. You never stir the deeper water. The foaming and rushing on top make you seem busy, active, productive, but you are not drawing from the greater resources. You are not even allowing yourself to look that deep.

Deep in that undisturbed place are the visions and dreams. You sunk them like a pirate’s chest. You left them there to wait. You wait too long, you’ll die and they will die with you.

Meanwhile, there are storms and troubles building on the surface. You are navigating your boat down the river and you have to pay attention. If you jump off to dive into deeper places, the boat will hit the bank. You’ll lose direction. You’ll lose everything. The wind will fling your vessel and all it holds up and down the river. You will surface and find yourself alone, struggling to swim with no place to rest.

But if you wait until everything is calm, find a good place to tie up your boat, secure your stuff, clean up the storm damage, make sure everyone is okay… the next wind will be rising. Too late to dive in now; you’ve got to handle this first. Maybe then…

That perfect calm never comes. We have to find a way to live, to keep cruising down the river, maintaining a steady course, and get to that treasure. Nobody wants a shipwreck. But what is the good of an empty ship? Or one with a hold full of junk, haphazard leftovers you skimmed off the surface as you floated by? You may get to port safely, but what will you have once you arrive? The treasure is not for later; it is for now. If it is truly treasure, it will survive the using, the journey, and so will we.

We have to clear out the junk so there is room for the treasure. We must invent ways to handle the storms and keep going in the right direction. We must find a way to get down, get deep, get to what really matters and bring it into our ship. We must make those dives often so that as we use our treasure along the way we can replenish our store.

It seems impossible, but it isn’t. There are ways to live deeper than this surface scurrying that we do. As we begin to wake up, we can find them.

The first step toward fulfilment is dissatisfaction.

Resistance is the most toxic force on the planet. It is the root of more unhappiness than poverty, disease, and erectile dysfunction. To yield to Resistance deforms our spirit. It stunts us and makes us less than we are and were born to be. If you believe in God (and I do) you must declare Resistance evil, for it prevents us from achieving the life God intended when He endowed each of us with our own unique genius. (From the book The War of Art by Steven Pressfield)

The work of art, of creation, is given all of us. We have a calling. Starting a profitable business, baking cookies, writing poetry, raising children, running a shop, fixing cars, making crafts, designing shoes, doing accounts, designing curriculum, painting, singing, reading, reviewing, helping, overseeing, managing, organizing; whatever the term, some action, some work for life, is yours. It belongs to you and you belong to it. No one is relieved of this responsibility. No one is inartistic, or unable, just dull, unmotivated, lazy, fearful.

Every attempt we make toward something higher and better finds resistance. We camouflage the call. We are afraid to see it. We make it all so complicated when most of it is so very, very simple. Go check the Self-Help section. Hundreds of titles all say essentially the same thing. This month’s version has newer packaging and a cuter catch-phrase. But it’s either 1) stuff you know instinctively or 2) drivel to make you feel good about ignoring the stuff you know instinctively.

This article, for instance. You don’t need it. You know there are things you need to do in life. You know there are particular things for you to do. You feel the tug. You know there is resistance because you are the one resisting. You even know what to do about the resistance, don’t you? No? Can’t remember? I’ll give you a hint:

Ignore the resistance and do what you’re supposed to do anyway. Take action.

(Okay, that was more than a hint.) But you knew already! You could probably write this article but for one small quality I (we assume) have and you (we assume) would like to have more of: the voice of successful experience.

Oh yes, you have experience. You have knowledge. but you’re reading this article on the premise that I, the Author-with-a-capital-A, not only have the knowledge but also have the map to the secret goldmine you need: success in applying the knowledge. That little glimmer of gold is what keeps the self-help genre alive. If we share the same knowledge, have similar experience, but I have succeeded and you have not (yet, you say to yourself), then I must have the secret. The key. The difference. It’s in this article, somewhere. If you read it all, it will be bestowed upon you, like a prize for wading through all the paragraphs: the final key to insert into the slot which will unlock the door which will release the treasure of your own creative genius successfully!

It’s just a flash in the pan. Ever hear of fool’s gold? It’s just a sparkly mineral, but there were lots of gold rush miners who got pretty excited. For a while.

The only thing I know that you don’t know is that there is no secret to success. Understand, I’m not saying there is nothing secret about the deep, divine, meaningful, beautiful, worthwhile things of life. There is, and all of us struggle continually to get closer, get more, get immersed, or else to utterly deny its existence. We identify with different parts of the struggle. Marriage, parenting, organizing, self-esteem, setting limits, creative flow. Whatever. The common, and misleading, theme is this: You are a Victim and I, the Helpful Author/Owner/Guru will set you free. I have the key that you, poor child, were never given. I have the question you didn’t know you could ask. I’m not better or smarter or worthier… just luckier.
Read the rest of this entry »

Errrr should be said in a kind of harsh, guttural, unhappy way, because I don’t really want to commit to exercising for 30 days. So I’m only going to commit to 24. Sundays off, people. There’s a reason God commanded us to take a day of rest: we need it.

Exercise Is in the Eye of the Baby Holder

I use the term exercise rather loosely. I have two itty bitty wonderful babies and a busy schedule. There will be no trips to the gym (which would require a membership anyway), no aerobics classes, no training for a marathon. Not any running or jogging or any movement faster than what I could do behind a double stroller.

The Stated Goal: Cardio + Toning

My daily goal is 15 - 30 minutes of cardio: walk, dance, work-out dvd at home; and 10 - 15 minutes of toning: stretching, strength, weights, abs. Minimum, then, is under 30 minutes (15 cardio plus 10 toning), so it’s doable even on busy days.

I miss being active. I was getting up early and walking before the babies woke up for a while, but I let the cold winter keep me in. Now that it’s getting warmer, I want to get outside and get the kids outside too. We all need to breathe air that hasn’t been recirculating through our house all day. Mmm mmm good.

Sexy Abs by Evening?

It’s not raining today, so after morning naps and lunch I will load them up and we’re off for a nice, brisk little walk. I did some crunches this morning. Joe was walking out the door and I yelled after him, “I’ll have sexy abs when you come home tonight!” I am going to have to do quite a few more crunches before that’s true. Maybe in 24 days…

While we’re out, I’ll stop in the library and pick up a couple of exercise dvds. I need something for rainy days, which we’re supposed to have more of later this week. I’ll also be looking for a good deal on a set of weights (light ones) and a mat. And an exercise ball! And a stretchy rubber work-out band! And sports bras! And new tennis shoes! And a tennis racket! And lipo!

The Rest of the Story

In keeping with this month’s challenge - exercise, in case you forgot - I’ll do some writing on health, exercise, and nutrition this month. I have at least five books I want to read and review. (Two of them are quite large, so I will break it down and just do sections of each, most likely.)

Back to Eden by Jethro Kloss.

Nourishing Traditions by Sally Fallon. This book has the greatest subtitle I’ve ever heard.

Today’s Herbal Health by Louise Tenney, M.H.

Chicken Soup and Other Folk Remedies by Joan Wilen and Lydia Wilen. (Think they’re related?)

Alternative Cures by Bill Gottlieb.

I notice as I write this list that they are all on nutrition, herbs, natural medicine and none discussing exercise and fitness. I’ll just keep a weather eye out for some good information on that subject. Something besides my own daily adventures, that is.

Help Me

I need, crave, long for, yearn to have the voice of experience here. I didn’t play any sports growing up (something I now regret). I’ve never jogged more than maybe 3 miles at a time, and that nearly killed me. My work-out gear is my pair of blue and green Saucony shoes. I consider climbing trees a viable strength-training routine. I have horrible balance. I fall over during those stretching routines that require you to lift one leg and one arm at the same time. I do frequently drink water out of those squirty-top bottles, so that gives me kind of an edge.

So, any tips, tricks, recommendations, routines, secrets, advice that you healthy, fit, active, sporty people have: share them with me, please!

I Can Do Anything for a Month… Maybe.

I am a little obsessed with personal growth, life improvement, all things moving me toward being a better person and living a better life. I’ve only got maybe 80 years here on earth, and I would like to make the most of it. The trouble is that it’s just difficult becoming a better person. I’ve got lots of habits that are hard to kick. Nothing really terrible or criminal or any worse than the next guy, but lots of things that keep me at a mediocre level in many areas of my life.

I have discovered that I can get momentum up for a while but then I just wimp out. I need to build up more self-discipline. It is a long, slow process, but I am determined to keep trying and keep pushing because I am simply not satisfied with mediocrity. So. I read about this idea of a monthly challenge, and I think it is worth trying.

The concept is simple: try something for a month. There are two basic kinds of monthly challenges, same concept but slightly different vision. The first promotes a habit. The 30-Day Challenge at Steve Pavlina’s site is a good example. This type of monthly challenge gets you to put forward enough energy for the 30 days you’ve committed to. You trick yourself - “it’s only for 30 days” - but after those 30 days it has become a habit and you can continue it, if so desired, with much less effort.
The second kind of monthly challenge promotes a project. NaNoWriMo is, perhaps, the best-known of these challenges. The point is to put forward as much energy as possible to complete a (large) project in 30 days. The goal is completion, not perfection. You can let other things slide a bit in order to complete the project; you can always go back and work on the details later. The month of intense effort gets you through the project without a chance to lose momentum.

The monthly challenge possibilities are endless. Whatever habit you need to establish Read the rest of this entry »

Tools of Simple Lunches

To-go containers
Leftovers
Non-cook options
Heated options
Prepared fresh food

Using the Tools

To-Go Containers
For those who must take their lunches or prepare them for others who take them to work or school, your choice of to-go containers can make lunch simple or complicated. Disposable, restaurant-style boxes are a good option if you find that your Tupperware never makes it home. Yes, it is more waste and more recycling, but if your plastic containers disappear you have to replace them. Better to replace paper than plastic.

A good thermos is indispensable for colder weather. Sandwich bags, zipper-type bags, paper lunch bags, plastic wrap, foil: there are endless options. The best way is to determine what type of lunches you will be making regularly, then stock up on containers that work for you. If you, your spouse, and/or your child will bring home reusable containers, they are best. If not, get something inexpensive and make of recycled materials if possible, and keep a good supply on hand.

Leftovers
You can provide almost every lunch from left-over dinner meals, if you so choose. Make more than is needed for dinner for your family, and go ahead and portion it out into the appropriate lunch container before dinner. Don’t feel that you have to wait until everyone has eaten and scrape up what is left. If you know you have more than enough, remove the part that will be someone’s lunch. We tend to eat as much as we see available: more if there is more, less if there is less. Help fight obesity and remove the lunch portion before it disappears at dinner! Read the rest of this entry »

The Tools of Simple Breakfasts

To-go breakfast edibles
Options: non-cook, quick-cook, make-ahead
A well-stocked freezer
A specific breakfast time

Using the Tools

To-Go Breakfast Edibles
Every now and then, or perhaps more often than that, you’re going to have a morning that just won’t come together. It’s best to be prepared and keep a supply of breakfast items that can be eaten en route. Granola bars, protein bars, bananas or apples, or any of the multitude of breakfast bars are all good options. Except for the fruit, all of those options are rather over-processed to be a healthy choice for every day. But when you’re in a pinch and you know it, it is better to eat something processed than nothing at all. Combine a banana or apple with a protein bar and you won’t be doubling over from hunger at mid-morning.

Options: Non-Cook, Quick-Cook, and Make-Ahead
Non-cook options include cereal and milk, yogurt and granola, fresh fruit of any kind, bagels, and smoothies.
Quick-cook options include oatmeal, cream of wheat type cereals, toast, and eggs.
Make-ahead options include breakfast casseroles and any baked goods you make yourself: muffins, scones, biscuits, etc.
The idea is not to have all of the options listed above and pick your way through them each morning. We’re going for simple. Knowing your morning schedule and approximately how much time you have both to prepare, eat, and clean up breakfast, you need to choose the options that best fit. If you’re looking at ten minutes, go for the non-cook options, preferably those with little or no cleaning needed, like fruit and bagels. Add a glass of milk to get some protein. If you have twenty to thirty minutes, you could opt for one of the quick-cook options. Twenty minutes is enough time to make toast, scramble an egg, eat, and put your dishes in the dishwasher. Thirty minutes is enough time to make oatmeal, cream of wheat, or an omelet, eat, and clean up.
The make-ahead options could work for shorter or longer time periods, if you have the time and desire to make breakfast the night before. You can put together a breakfast casserole while you’re cleaning up dinner (or during your extended weekly prep time) and keep it in the refrigerator. In the morning, simply pop it in the oven while you shower and dress, then take fifteen minutes to sit and eat. Or if you enjoy baking, make up a batch of muffins or scones. You can go ahead and cook them so they’re ready to grab on your way out the door, or you can get the batter from the refrigerator, cook them while you get ready, and enjoy them warm and fresh.
What you don’t want to do is take on more than your morning can accomodate. Don’t try to make an omelet if you have to leave in ten minutes. Save those labor-intensive, more elaborate breakfasts for the weekends. Waffles, pancakes, and the like are great as a Saturday morning brunch or a Sunday evening meal. Read the rest of this entry »