In a way, that’s great, because instead of being tempted to just sit around in my robe and sip my coffee, I go ahead and get dressed. Too chilly, too much of a breeze otherwise… And getting dressed helps me to resist the urge to go back to bed for just a few more minutes, which helps me to do something, like work, instead of drool on my pillow.

I’m also ravenously hungry early in the morning. I usually wake up around 5 to make a bathroom trip, and as I stumble back to bed my belly starts to rumble. I’ll fall back asleep, but by the time my husband’s alarm goes off at 6, the rumblings are too loud to ignore. I have to get out of bed, which means I have to get dressed due to the wardrobe issues, which means that I have managed to stay awake for the last couple of mornings instead of falling back into said bed with said pillow for said drooling session.

I’d rather sleep; it’s just too much trouble…

Thank you, pregnancy, for helping me achieve my monthly challenge goals.

Monday I got in 6 hours of work; Tuesday a little over 4 hours. I’m right on target, and if I continue to be so, I’ll be making a bit over my 25-hour mark this week. I might celebrate by sleeping in on Saturday. Maybe I’ll just put a muffin by the bed so I can munch it at 5 and then go back to sleep… Hmmm.

Collected Thoughts on Early Rising:

” In summer, no adult ought to lie in bed after four o’clock, and no child, except the mere infant, after five.” From the ‘and you thought 6am was too early‘ files, a.k.a. “The Young Mother: Management of Children in Regard to Health,” Early Rising section, by William A. Alcott.

”

• Set my alarm for the same time everyday.
• Get up. Turn off alarm, which is strategically placed on the other side of the room.  (I’ve learned this is my most critical moment in getting up early. It is crucial that I never, never, never, hit the snooze button or lie back down to catch a few more winks.)
• Head straight to bathroom and then proceed directly to the coffee pot.
• Be prepared to feel absolutely miserable for about 10 to 15 minutes. (But the feeling of misery turns into pure gladness as I soon experience the delight of having that alone time and as I reap the benefits all day long. It is totally worth feeling miserable for about 15 minutes.)
• Your body responds to a regular wake up time. In other words, it gets easier.”

from the “strategies for getting up early” category, by Nicole Whitacre for girl talk blog, explaining the 5:00 Club.

I’m ready for a challenge and excited about how this one will help me get closer to some long-held goals. I’ve noticed that most of my personal challenges related to time and how I manage (or mismanage) it. Same with this month’s: my challenge for February is to work 25 hours a week. On business (writing and web work). Every Mom works far more than 25 hours a week doing Mom-stuff; we don’t need a challenge for that sort of thing, unless it might be a challenge to do less.

25 hours a week of business work is going to require some good sticking-to-a-scheduleness, which I’m not good at. I make great schedules, but I don’t use them well. One day I will pull all the pages out of the old planners stuffed into bookcases and wallpaper a room with them. It will be my annotated life history.
Joe and I were talking last night about doubt and how it sabotages our lives. We let it. I set high goals for myself, and not two minutes later I start questioning: “Who am I to think I can do this?”

I’m Super Woman, that’s who I am!

Except for the leotard. And the super powers. And except that I know I am not. I know that there’s a good reason for doubt (really? is there?) because I do have limits, and I do fail. How often do I fail because of doubts? They tend to be self-fulfilling prophecies.
Women tend to multitask; women who happen to be wives & mommies & worker-bees, whether at home or in an outside job, multiply their multitasking. Quadrupletask? Sometimes we multi(quadrupli)taskers need to step back, say no, take a break, simplify. Well and good.

But doubt is not a good thing. (Doughnuts are, though.) I may not be able to achieve all my goals, but then again, maybe I can. Successful people are the ones who go for it, taking for granted that they’ll acquire the abilities and resources needed as they go. (This is not a blanket justification for taking out large loans on faith that you’ll have the ability to pay it back as needed; just want to clear that up.) You can never be perfectly prepared, or perfectly anything. Sometimes you just have to take the risk and figure it out as you go along.

I don’t want to fail because I talk myself out of trying. Reaching goals is difficult. Resistance always shows up in, in its various toxic forms. It’s my job to squish the resistance, not feed it cookies and give it a warm bed right next to mine.

Once again, this month’s challenge is my opportunity to change the habits that hold me back. I hear plenty of opinions and cultural idioms that encourage mediocrity, complacency. It starts way back in school when one year, instead of getting an A and waving around your gold star running home to show Mom, you get an A and quietly turn your paper over so the kid next to you doesn’t notice and tease.

Opinions and cultural idioms are notoriously inaccurate. I have a feeling there’s a greater motive behind all those voices, and it’s not rational; it’s fear. Fear of failure, yes, and fear of someone else succeeding, showing us it can be done, raising the standard.

We rarely expect enough from ourselves. We never demand it. Your version of success is, I’m sure, not the same as mine, but it requires the same kind of fundamental change to reach it. We have to stop expecting, and accepting, less from ourselves. We are capable of more.

How will you challenge yourself to be more this month?

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Image Credits

Hourglass photo courtesy of bogenfreund on Flickr; Superwoman Cartoon courtesy of Inspiration Line.

Speaking of details, let’s just get right to it and I’ll break down this monthly challenge. Here’s where I am, personally, professionally, esoterically speaking… (everybody go look up esoterically now. Oh, nevermind. I’ll do it for you. Here.) Where was I?
Right. Where I am, in broad, somewhat vague “life” terms: 1) happy about the birth of our third baby, 2) happy and excited about the major life/career change my husband is navigating (more on that in the future), 3) happy with the progress I’m making in my writing career, 4) overwhelmed by the thought of being a mom of 3 and getting too busy with day-to-day and forgetting to enjoy these children, 5) freaked out and trying to remain calm about the major life/career change my husband is navigating that will, necessarily, constitute a major life change for me, too, and 6) aware that if I don’t exhibit some serious self-discipline all the progress I’ve made in writing will crumble around me.

Hm. I think that just about covers it. Basically, I’m looking at a lot – a whole huge heapin’ lot – of change right now. I am not really a big fan of change. I like Christmas traditions and having the same bedtime every night. I am not a naturally spontaneous person. I have come to appreciate spontaneity, and enjoy it, and even, sometimes, purposely incorporate it into my life. (Is it still spontaneity if you “purposely incorporate it” into your life? Probably not.)

So, just from a basic “me” point of view, change is more threatening than welcoming. I know from life experience that even the most threatening change can end up being amazing. However, I still default to feelings of panic more than feelings of happy, calm, comfort. This is true whether the change is planned or unplanned. Change itself that makes me a little nervous.

Change makes me nervous because I feel out of control. I can’t predict what life will be like, if I will like it, if I will be able to handle it. I can plan for it, but I can’t preview before we go live. I would like a preview.

September is about counterbalancing that out-of-control feeling by taking charge of what I can. Not everything, and not all at once; I’m talking about a steady effort in dealing with those things that I’ve put off and in building self-discipline in areas that I’ve allowed to grow flabby.

Enough introduction. Here’s my plan for the September RECLAIM YOUR LIFE Monthly Challenge. (I think the title is kind of catchy…)

1) Set priorities
2) Set a basic schedule
3) Simplify maintenance
4) Create routines
5) Choose project(s)
6) Choose a personal goal(s)
7) Track progress for one month

More on this tomorrow. For now, I’m off to write some other articles, as that is next on my schedule. La de da!

It’s time. I just finished writing three articles and I’m munching a butterscotch oatmeal cookie from a batch that Mara ‘helped’ me make this afternoon. (Her newest favorite thing to do is “Help cook, please!” and it’s really cute. I’ll take pictures next time and post them. Washing dishes is the highlight.) So, the finished article and the yummy cookie (perfect as I felt my stomach start a warning rumble of “I’m hungry and if you don’t feed me soon I will wreak vengeance upon you to the fourth generation”) are results of going with the option I talked about a couple of days ago: Ignore the pain (irritation/annoyance/emotional hang-up/whatever the case may be) and get on with what you need to do.

A New Month, A New Challenge

And now I find myself at the beginning of a new month, which needs a new monthly challenge to go along with it. The basic idea is simple: choose Option IGNORE THE PAIN for the month of September. But I think I need to put that plan into something a little more specific so it will actually work, so that I’ll know it’s working (or not), so that I can brag (or cry in shame).

The Two Components: Schedule and Projects

I’ve still got a couple of days before September 1st proper to ponder this, but I think two components are needed here: 1) Sticking to my schedule (which would include actually making a schedule) and 2) Tackling a few projects.
Those two elements are the ones which go when I step into survival mode. I don’t look at the clock, let alone a schedule. I meander along with no regard for silly things like “dinner time.” I notice with mild surprise that the kids are whiny, and wonder why until Joe suggests that perhaps it could be because they are a) hungry or b) up past their bedtime or c) both.

And projects! In survival mode, I’ve completed a project if I get dressed by noon. Check off a major project if I actually cook something. Bonus points for cleaning it up.

The schedule keeps me on track with the basics, the requirements to maintain a functional household and keep me, Joe, and two little cuties fed, clothed, and reasonably clean. The schedule reminds me to pay bills, answer emails, write articles, and get some exercise.

The projects are, technically, “extra” work, but it’s extra work that will result in continuing benefits. Cleaning up a few areas, splashing some paint around, taking care of some piles and setting up some systems will help me to enjoy my home and my work more and to be more efficient in it.

I think this is a good plan. I think I’ll stick to it. I think I can, I think I can, I think I can.

Update (Wednesday): 40 minutes cardio (walking); random stretching throughout the day whenever I thought about it.

Wrap-Up: I would call this challenge about a 70% success. I have been successful in the cardio part of the routine, which was more important to me and required more time and effort.

However, on the stretching/toning portion of the challenge, I failed miserably. With the cardio, which mainly involved walking, I had several routes I knew well and enjoyed, I had the kids involved, and I had a specific time to get out and walk. I also had a back-up plan for rainy days.

With stretching/toning, I never put any of those things in place, or at least not firmly enough. I never really stuck with one routine long enough to know it well and feel like I was getting somewhere. I was trying different stretches, different toning exercises, but I needed to just compile a few effective ones into a 10 or 15 minutes routine that I could get comfortable with. I also couldn’t figure out how to involve the kids, which isn’t completely necessary, but a nice bonus when it is something I can do with them rather than something I need to fit into those naptimes.

The kicker, though, was not having any specific time to do stretching and toning, whether with kids or not. I’m going to continue this exercise challenge, unofficially, for another month because I like the results I have so far. I’d like to get some more of the same!

Here are my recommendations, simplified:

-Have a specific time and place.

-Get yourself some good work out clothes.

-Get any necessary gear (yoga mat, light weights, water bottle).

-Have a plan for cardio work and for toning work. Have a back-up plan if the outdoors isn’t cooperative.

-Have some variety but also stick to one thing long enough to feel like you can master it and get the most out of it before moving on.

Happy Exercising!

Image courtesy of mikebaird on Flickr.

Update (Monday): 5 minutes stretching; 40 minutes cardio (walk through town with one kid in the stroller & one in the carrier).

On Writing:
It takes a certain amount of audacity to be a writer. You have to overcome the tendency toward self-degradation. Who I am that I have anything worthwhile to say? Why should people pay attention to me? Well, maybe they shouldn’t, but nobody else is writing what I’m thinking. Maybe they’re thinking it, too. Maybe I’m not original or wise or witty. But I’m the only one willing to put it on paper and judge what it’s worth. Once that’s done, once it is written, we can all disregard it as we please. But I can’t disregard it until it is written.

On Saying No: (from Alexandra Stoddard’s book Making Choices).

Nothing materializes without a program. …The essence of no is to have priorities and keep them in order.

No has a negative ring to many, but if we don’t look at it clearly and use it, we will lose the opportunity to discipline ourselves, to manage our own affairs.

No saves you from the dangerous myth that you’re indispensable.

No is not negative; it actively leads to the positive. My own struggle to accept certain restrictions on my time, energy, and money have helped me reach my goals.

Tip: Write something today. Say no to something you normally say yes to today.