1. take responsibility
The first and most important step: take responsibility for your own life. Take responsibility for your own mistakes. Take responsibility for building the better life that you want to have. It won’t happen on its own. It won’t happen because things finally fall into place, someone notices you, you get the deal, or you find true love. A good life will not just happen. Take responsibility for what you put into each day you’re given, because out of that your life is built.
2. take action
All the insight you gain, and the responsibility you take, will not change your life unless you take action on what you learn. Small actions add up. Small habits build a life. Small steps each day move you toward where you ultimately want to be. But no action, or the same, thoughtless, stupid actions every day will keep you where you are (for a time) and allow your life to deteriorate. Not what you’re going for, right? Move forward! Even just a little bit. Progress creates progress.
3. deal with the obstacles
You’ll encounter misunderstanding from those closest to you, internal resistance that is much stronger than you anticipate, and old habits that are screaming at you to let them live. You’ll find that becoming a happy, productive person; living a simple, sane, and focused life; cutting out the detritas, getting rid of life clutter, saying no to obligations, and making decisions based on truth instead of assumptions tends to
make other people nervous and doesn’t fit into the way our culture works. Obstacles are a sign that you’re doing something different and good. Keep doing it; don’t be afraid of what stands in your way. Take it down, one rock at a time.
4. seek wisdom
Learn from the people who are succeeding at what you wish to succeed in. Bring in new ideas on a regular basis. Don’t assume that you have the best methods for what you want to do or be. Often you’ll be hit with a new idea or strategy that will make everything easier. Seek out information, conversation, and don’t isolate yourself. If your ideas are good, they’ll stand the test of exposure. If they’re not, they’ll be improved. Keep discovering. Make “seeking wisdom” a key habit of life, something you do automatically. Be open and humble and ready to learn.
5. be creative
All people are creative, and creativity doesn’t mean you need to make detailed craft on the weekend, write a book, compose music, or be in some “artistic” endeavor. Creativity is a method, a way of thinking, not a particular area of expertise. You can be creative in how you do the most mundane of tasks. A dearth of creativity leads to a life of mediocrity. Try new things. Think outside the box. Don’t let the phrase “this is how we do things” be part of your life. Be willing to do things differently. You can always go back to the old way, right? What’s the risk?
6. simplify
You’ll always have more options than you have time. There will always be more opportunities than you have ability. There will always be more stuff than there is space. Accept this ratio, and don’t feel like you have to do it all, be it all, or have it all. Focus on what you love the most, on the things that matter most. Keep less stuff in your house, but make it high-quality. Give yourself some “white space” in your life, in terms of tangible stuff, social/cultural obligations, time and scheduling. Don’t cram your life full. Keep space in it. Space fosters creativity and helps you see what you value most and enjoy most. Plus less stuff means less time spent cleaning…
7. focus on what matters
What matters to everyone else won’t matter to you. What matters to you won’t matter to everyone else. Try this: take five minutes and think about how you would spend your life if you were diagnosed with a fatal disease at an advanced stage. Morbid, maybe. But the prospect of imminent death brings clarity. It shows you how much of life is just “busy” and, conversely, how much (and what) actually matters. Not everything matters; not everything can matter. We’re simply not physically, mentally, and emotionally capable of investing to the same extent in every activity, relationship, or opportunity. The clearer you can become on what matters most to you, the more you can define life on your terms, cut out what isn’t important, and enjoy a better life as a result.
8. let go of assumptions
Assumptions are the number-one killer of happy, healthy relationships, guilt-free living, and creative, productive work. Assumptions tell us all sorts of things. They dictate the way we should dress, wear our hair, converse with other humans, and what kind of mattress we should buy. They tell us how to think, speak, feel, respond. They exert
dictatorial rule in our relationships, controlling how we see others, what we expect from others, and what we feel about others. Some assumptions can be helpful and good. Most are simply hold-overs from the past, from certain mindsets or cultures or family histories, and are often outdated or simply need to be seen in context.
9. look for ways to help
Maybe you don’t have extra money, so you can’t donate large amounts to charity or even afford to give the guy on the corner that $20 in your pocket. But you can give time. You can give half a sandwich. What can you give, how can you help: not just the random strangers in obvious financial need or the huge world issues like hunger and clean water. How can you help your husband achieve his dreams? How can you help your kids grow up to be happy, independent, creative adults? How can you help the world with the skills you have? How can you help people who are stuck, in one way or another? Look around your life; even the simplified, pared-down, decluttered version of your life will have plenty of people who need something you can offer. Start offering.
10. go for it with crazy, unstoppable passion
When you figure out what matters, when you get rid of the dead weight, and when you’re ready to put assumptions aside in favor of thoughtful living, it’s time. Quit talking about it and start moving forward. Go for it, boldly, whatever it is. Be crazy-passionate. Stay up late, get up early. Forget about how much sleep you need; let the
crazy, unstoppable passion for what you can do and be drive you forward and create success in your life. Be bold, be fearless, be unstoppable, be a lunatic, go for it. This is how lives change; this is how the world changes.
Image:
song of the siren by
Darwin Bell
This is so great!! Annie, I’m going to share this if that’s cool!
Thanks, Elsa! feel free to share!