{from 09 April 2009} This is what I tell Mara & Robbie when they get those frequent little booboos: “You’re okay. Stop crying. Back to playing!” The essence is this: Don’t waste your time whining, even if it’s a real hurt.
Maybe I sound like a mean Mom, but I’m trying to help my children. I don’t want their pleasure in life to be constantly ruined by the little upsets. Hurts always happen. Real ones. Stopping and letting every single owie become a big interruption in the day’s work and play is the beginning of emotional bondage. I fight it all too often in my own head. This morning, for example: day 2 of life with 3 under 3.
I did too much yesterday (due to the ‘me trying to control everything’ tendency) and I was hurting worse this morning than I did yesterday. As Joe got ready to leave, I nursed Zeke and whined over my booboos.
Why can’t my Mom still be alive and here to help me? Why is all my family so far away? Why is everyone so busy? Why can’t Joe take more time off work?
Whine, whine, whine, whine, whine.
Meanwhile, a perfect and healthy baby rested on me, two precious children slept in the next room, and my tired husband prepared for his busy, 10-hour workday without complaint. He had been up multiple times the night before, too. A baby crying in the same room tends to wake up all the occupants… But he was up, bleary eyes and all, putting on his uniform, grabbing a lunch, and going to work because that’s what he needs to do.
I learn a lot from him.
Image courtesy of “CAVE CANEM.”